


Self Immolation

by Utari



Category: Digimon Adventure Zero Two | Digimon Adventure 02
Genre: Justification of Rape, M/M, Rape Aftermath, Suicide, Victim Blaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 07:13:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3479105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Utari/pseuds/Utari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daisuke continues to help his crush, Taichi, despite him falling deeper and deeper in binge-drinking and alcohol dependence but Taichi does something in a drunken stupor that changes their lives forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self Immolation

Daisuke groaned loudly. The phone was ringing. It was the middle of the night. The phone was ringing in the middle of the night. He groaned again and reached out towards the nightstand where the piercing sound that had woken him from his well-deserved rest originated.

"'llo", he said, taking no pains to hide the fact that he was not thrilled at all at being woken at such a late hour.

"Daisuke, Taichi needs some help getting home", it was one of Taichi's new friends. Though perhaps 'drinking buddy' would be more apt since that's all they seemed to do.

Daisuke groaned into the receiver. This was the third time in as many months. It was going to be the last time too.

"So what?" He knew what he was going to ask but damned if he was going to just hop-to at a moments notice without him stating it explicitly.

"So, I have to leave to get on my train and can't help him, you're not too far away, come get him."

"This is the last time", he stated angrily, "If he does this again I don't care if he has to sleep on the sidewalk, don't call me about this again."

"Alright, gotta go"

There was a muffled click as the receiver on the other end was hung up.

Daisuke stood and dressed himself angrily. At least feeling this pissed off got his adrenaline pumping enough to wake him almost fully so he wasn't clumsily moping around.

He'd had such a big crush on Taichi for the longest time. He wanted to tell him, or rather he was _going_ to tell him, but right around the time Daisuke had mustered up the courage to do so, Taichi had started drinking more and more heavily. It didn't matter that this mainly happened on the weekends, he was still usually mildly drunk even during the week.

It started slow at first, Daisuke put off telling him because he was obviously drunk or hung-over the times he'd gone over to tell him, but as Taichi began drinking more and more frequently and getting more and more intoxicated when he did drink, Daisuke's attraction to him started to fade.

He still loved him dearly. If he hadn't, he certainly wouldn't have bothered to help him home again the second time, especially after he'd puked all over the both of them. Now he was on the third time but this was definitely going to be the last. He would be enabling him if he helped him out every time he got into a rough spot from drinking.

He finished pulling a jacket over himself and went down to the bar where he knew Taichi would be waiting. Fortunately it wasn't too far of a walk. Arriving, he found Taichi sitting on the sidewalk in front of the bar with his head bobbing slightly like he was nodding in and out of consciousness. It was a cold night and Taichi's jacket was nowhere to be found.

"Taichi come on, get up", he said as he approached.

Taichi turned his head towards him but it was still slowly bobbling around. Daisuke couldn't tell if he was trying to locate him and was having trouble seeing him through all the alcohol or if he was so far gone that he couldn't even see him at all.

"Who? Wha-?" Taichi was obviously completely out of it.

Daisuke sighed. He was so angry at Taichi. He was ruining his life and his health by getting this drunk. He'd managed to avoid failing any of his classes so far but Daisuke feared that it wouldn't be long before something more serious happened to him. Daisuke also felt very sorry for him and even moreso, felt embarrassed at his behavior. More than that though, he was just disappointed at seeing his sempai acting so vulgar and reckless, which was the worst thing of all.

Without warning, Taichi leaned over and vomited all over the sidewalk. Daisuke closed his eyes to avoid seeing it, almost choosing to walk home and leave Taichi to deal with the mess he'd gotten himself into on his own.

Opening his eyes, he saw that miraculously Taichi had managed to avoid getting any vomit on himself.

"Can you even stand on your own?" he said.

"I- huh?"

"Stand up! I'm taking you home. Or stay there for all I care!", Daisuke's heart was breaking seeing Taichi like this. He'd only seen him this bad a few times. He'd broken off most contact with him so he wouldn't have to see him so drunk but this was an excess even for Taichi. 

Somehow, he managed to get Taichi on his feet but he was practically carrying him home. Knowing that Taichi's place was farther than his own, he instead decided to take Taichi to his own apartment.

"If you puke in my apartment I'm making you clean it up this time!" he said to him.

They stopped a few times so Taichi could get sick again. Daisuke hoped that if he got it all out of his system now, he wouldn't puke in his apartment. To be on the safe side, he stopped in front of his building and sat with him for a good 20 minutes to make sure he was done. He was already awake and too pissed off to go right back to bed anyway; he might as well try to make sure his apartment wouldn't get stunk up with vomit again. He was freezing out here even with his jacket on but damned if he cared if Taichi froze at this point. Maybe the cold would sober him up a bit, though it seemed like Taichi was numb enough to not even feel even the least bit cold.

Satisfied he was finally done, Daisuke had to pick him up and carry him into the elevator and then into his room. He dumped him on the floor in front of the couch without as much care is he would've taken if he hadn't been so utterly pissed off right now. Better to dump him on the floor so he wouldn't have to worry about him falling off the couch. He threw a blanket over him before heading back to bed.

A few tears streamed down his face before he got under the covers thinking about how pathetic Taichi had become. He'd tried to talk to him about his drinking but Taichi had brushed it off as needless concern. "I'm in college now, everybody's drinking", was his excuse.

He hated the fact that Taichi was willing to spend time with friends that obviously didn't care about him the way he or the other chosen children did, and he wasn't the only one who'd expressed concern over Taichi's drinking.

As much as it hurt, he knew the only thing he could do would be to leave Taichi to face the repercussions of his actions on his own, after tonight at least. He was going to make sure that Taichi knew that he wasn't going to come to his rescue anymore.

He'd only been visiting with Taichi once or twice a week after his own classes because Taichi had offered to tutor him. Any other time during the week and Taichi was either too drunk or too hungover. It was nice to be able to see him now and again even if he was a mess most of the rest of the time, despite the fact that he often sipped a beer while he tutored him. He wanted to tell Taichi how he felt about him but he knew there couldn't be a relationship so long as Taichi was getting so wasted so frequently.

He pushed everything out of his mind. There was nothing he could do about it now. Maybe if Taichi woke up on the street somewhere after a night of drinking, covered in his own vomit, he would finally see that his drinking was being taken to an excess.

He closed his eyes and went to sleep. He was woken up sometime later by some sounds coming from the other room. Taichi was up and it was still dark out. Reminding himself that this was the last time, he got up and went to check on him. Taichi was rummaging around in his fridge like a wild boar. Finding an old sandwich half, he took it and began eating it.

"You feeling OK?" Daisuke asked, uncertain about whether or not Taichi eating was a good idea or not. At least if he got sick again now, it would be all liquid and easier to clean up.

"Yeah, what're you doing here?" he responded. He seemed to have sobered up considerably from his previously nigh comatose state, though he was still obviously quite drunk.

"I live here", Daisuke stated matter-of-factly. "I didn't feel like dragging you all the way to your place so I brought you to mine."

"Oh", Taichi looked down at the sandwich, then back to Daisuke.

"Don't worry", Daisuke assured him, "I was going to throw that out tomorrow anyway."

A big smile spread over Taichi's face. "You're such a good friend to me!"

Shaking his head, Daisuke retorted, "This is the last time. If you can't control your drinking enough to get home somehow, I'm not going to take care of you!"

"Ah, don't worry."

Taichi had sloppily finished his sandwich with several large bites that looked like they could've choked him and Daisuke wanted to go back to bed. "Alright, you ate something. Now go back to bed, it's late."

"You're so good to me!" Taichi said as he walked over to Daisuke, arms outstretched.

"Get away from me!" He commanded as Taichi tried to hug him.

Taichi managed to grab hold of him and squeezed, though Daisuke's hands were on Taichi's chest trying to push him away in vain.

"Get off me!" He said loudly, though he was still being careful not to wake the neighbors.

"Aw, c'mon. You like me don't you? I heard that you did."

Daisuke briefly wondered how and from whom he'd heard anything before repeating himself. "Get off me Taichi", he was pleading more than demanding this time.

Reluctantly, Taichi let him go.

"Doncha' wanna kiss me?" He said, sounding a bit hurt.

"You're too drunk right now. It's gross. I wish you could smell yourself. You smell like puke and cheap booze."

With that, Daisuke turned and went back to his room. Taichi was following him as he walked down the hall. He went to shut the door but Taichi walked right past him.

"C'mon", he said, "I'm in the mood"

Daisuke was furious. "Go back to the other room, I need to sleep now!"

"No", Taichi said.

"Either go into the other room or go home!" Daisuke was getting tired of this.

Suddenly, in an unexpectedly co-ordinated manner, Taichi lunged forward and embraced Daisuke again. He kissed him forcefully. It was disgusting. He tasted like vomit. Daisuke tried to struggle and push him away but Taichi was much bigger and stronger than him. He was also concerned that if he fought any harder than he was, the neighbors would wake up and might call for help upon hearing such a commotion.

Taichi continued to kiss and suck on Daisuke's face and grope him forcefully and in an uncoordinated drunken manner. He was pushing him back towards the bed.

Daisuke began to panic. He knew what Taichi wanted. He also knew that he was out of senses enough to do it.

"Taichi, please", he voice sounded so much more scared than he wanted it, "I don't want this, not right now."

"But I know you like me", Taichi responded somewhat flatly as he continued to grope and fondle him.

"Maybe, but I don't want to do this now. Please Taichi, you're scaring me. Let me go. Plea- mmph!", Taichi's wandering mouth met up with his own again. He stuck his tongue into his mouth and was aggressively licking around the inside of his mouth.

Daisuke struggled harder but Taichi broke the kiss, pushed him down onto the bed, and resumed violating his mouth after pinning him down with his body.

Daisuke was terrified now. He could feel Taichi's erection through his pants. If he couldn't stop this now, it would end only one way.

Taichi broke the kiss and Daisuke began pleading, begging him to stop.

"Shh, it's okay", Taichi tried to soothe him as he stroked his face. "I understand, you wanna play hard to get. Don't worry, I know you really want this."

Daisuke continued to beg Taichi to stop, cringing as he continued to stroke his face. He promised him they could do it later, said he thought he had an STI, anything he could think of to get him to lose interest as his hands wandered lower and lower and began to disrobe him.

Finally, after Taichi unzipped his own pants and his penis began to poke at Daisuke's still virginal entrance, something inside of him snapped and he knew there was no way out.

"Wait Taichi, you're going to hurt me if you don't use some lube."

"Huh?" Taichi stopped.

"You don't want to hurt me right? Let me get some lube out of my nightstand. It'll only take a second."

Taichi mumbled something in agreement and partially slid off of Daisuke, though he was still groping his legs as Daisuke leaned over to get the small bottle from his nightstand. He may have been a virgin in that he'd never been with another person before, but he had a few toys he made use of on occasion. He knew how bad it could hurt; how severely he could be injured if Taichi entered him dry.

He fought back tears knowing he was taking an active part in his own rape. He tried to tell himself that he was only doing what he could to protect himself. A perforated colon could potentially be a life threatening injury. He wasn't really _allowing_ himself to be raped. This was like grabbing the blade of a knife being thrust at you during a mugging so your hand gets cut instead of getting stabbed in the chest. Right?

"Here, let me put it on." 

He was dearly hoping that once he started touching Taichi's penis, that he could stroke him to climax and avoid being penetrated at all, but Taichi was headstrong and rarely changed his mind once it'd been made.

"Mmmh", Taichi again mumbled in agreement. Daisuke squeezed some of the contents of the container onto Taichi's penis and began stroking it slowly. Taichi moaned pleasantly as he slowly picked up speed. He squeezed a bit more onto his fingers before setting the bottle on top of the nightstand and began to stroke Taichi with one hand whilst simultaneously working a finger into himself. If this didn't work, Taichi wasn't in the state of mind where he could be gentle.

Satisfied that he'd prepared his own entrance as best he could, he began stroking Taichi with both hands to which Taichi moaned louder and began thrusting his hips into his encircling fists.

'Maybe this will work. Maybe he thinks he's fucking me right now', Daisuke thought to himself. Any hopes that this would be the extent of Taichi's indiscretion were dashed when he pulled away and said, "That's enough."

Daisuke didn't have time to think about what was going on. Taichi quickly moved himself into a mounting position and began to push forward. Daisuke kept hoping that something, _anything_ would happen to distract Taichi so this wouldn't happen.

He tried to relax himself as best he could, but Taichi pushed forward painfully and his body couldn't help but try to clamp down on the intrusion.

Weeping as Taichi buried himself up to the hilt, painfully stretching him and feeling an odd burning sensation as he began to thrust in and out; he lay there and offered no struggles, no resistance to the person who had been his friend, to the person who had been his sempai for so many years.

He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on something else; **anything** that he could focus his mind on. His mind jumped from topic to topic as he was brought back from his distractions by an extra painful thrust every now and again. He began to space out and feel less and less pain as his entire body seemed to go numb.

Finally, Taichi's thrusts grew more and more erratic and he came. Daisuke squeezed tears out of his eyes as he shut them tightly, trying to block out the disgust he felt. Taichi then collapsed on top of him, unconscious.

He lay there for a moment before Taichi's weight began to make it too hard to breathe. He tried vainly to roll him over a few times before managing to partially wriggle out from under him and gain more leverage. He stood and wiped the tear-streaks from his face before grabbing a blanket, making sure to avoid even looking back at Taichi, and leaving his room for the couch.

He curled up into ball on the couch and slowly became aware of how much he hurt down there. He tried to ignore it but it became worse and worse so he went into the bathroom to see how bad it was. He dabbed at himself a few times with toilet paper; there was some blood on it. It wasn't a copious amount, but it was enough to scare him. He dabbed at it a few more times and there was less and less on the toilet paper.

'It's going away, that means it's not still bleeding', he reassured himself.

He continued to dab until there were only the faintest of traces left.

'It's gone now, I'm okay, it stopped bleeding'

He went back to the couch, walking carefully to keep from aggravating his soreness and curled up in the blanket again. He began asking himself why he didn't fight harder. He actually lubed himself up! Of course Taichi would think he wanted it! The fact that he told himself at the time that he was only doing this to keep himself from being hurt was really an excuse wasn't it? He could have yelled loud enough to get the neighbors to call for help if he really wanted to stop it.

He curled up even tighter. 'But that would've meant Taichi-sempai would've gotten in trouble', he realized.

He didn't want his sempai to get into trouble. He was so drunk he obviously wasn't thinking clearly. If he'd screamed then Taichi's life would've been ruined. Maybe he could forget about all this. He didn't have to see Taichi if he didn't want to, at least not for a while. He could cancel his study sessions with him if he wanted to. There was nothing saying he _had_ to see him on a regular basis, he'd already cut down the time he'd spent with him because he didn't like seeing him so drunk.

He was happy at least that tomorrow was a Saturday. Or technically it was already Saturday today, since it was after midnight already, but it was still dark out so it seemed like it was still a late Friday night. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep, eventually drifting off into a light slumber.

Daisuke woke at the first signs of light out. He hadn't slept well at all. He was very tired but he wanted to be out of his apartment when Taichi woke up so he wouldn't have to see him. He put on the clothes he'd worn the night before, not wanting to enter his room and risk waking Taichi. He paused after picking up his keys. He realized upon looking down that he was wearing the same clothes in which he'd been raped the night before.

'No, it wasn't rape', he corrected himself. 'Taichi was really drunk and anyone, drunk or not, would've thought I wanted it after lubing up my asshole and trying to stroke them off.'

Wanting to get out of the apartment as soon as possible, he continued by grabbing his wallet, then put his shoes on and left. He wandered aimlessly around the city. He stopped in an arcade but couldn't bring himself to enjoy any of the games. He went to get something to eat and only took a few bites before realizing he wasn't hungry. He walked around before feeling tired and sitting on a park bench, then quickly stood when he realized he wanted to keep moving.

He wandered back to his apartment building a few times, intent on returning home, but every time he did he continued walking along instead. He didn't want to return home yet. Taichi might still be in there. It wasn't even 7 o'clock in the morning when he left. Noon came and went, 3 o'clock came and he finally managed to eat something substantial. Now it was almost seven in the evening. Figuring that even Taichi couldn't sleep this late, even after a night of binge drinking, he finally decided to return home.

Walking up to his building as the sun began to set, he slowly made his way to his door and quietly put the key in the lock. He turned it and peeked inside. Taichi was sitting at his table eating a pizza. Daisuke steadied his nerves and walked in.

"Why are you still here?" He said, annoyed.

"Um, I wanted to apologize for anything I might've done to bother you", Taichi looked away and rubbed his neck nervously, "I don't really remember anything that happened last night."

Daisuke sighed in relief. If Taichi didn't remember anything, maybe he could pretend this never happened.

"Whatever. You weren't any more of a pain-in-the-ass than you usually are when you're drunk. I made sure you did all your puking outside this time."

Taichi hung his head in shame. "I'm sorry, I-" 

Daisuke cut him off. "Save it, this is the last time. I told your friends not to call me anymore. The next time you get drunk, you're on your own. I'm not going to keep helping you and I don't want to be around you anymore. Our study sessions are over. Go home!" Daisuke said, angrily pointing at the door, his entire arm outstretched.

Taichi stood slowly, mumbling an apology. He walked past Daisuke but stopped. He turned to Daisuke with a weird look on his face; Daisuke tensed up in anticipation.

"Did I do anything out of the ordinary? You seem really mad at me for some reason."

"You're a drunken mess! You woke me up in the middle of the night and I had to come carry you home while you were vomiting. For the **third** time! Isn't that reason enough?!"

Suddenly, Taichi stepped forward and grabbed Daisuke's arm with one hand and his shoulder with the other. Daisuke gritted his teeth as he tensed up in fear.

"It _was_ you, wasn't it?" Taichi said.

"Get off me!" Daisuke said, as he shook himself free and stepped over to the table where Taichi had been sitting, putting Taichi between him and the front door. "I don't know what you're talking about. Now _get out_!" He exclaimed as he pointed forcefully towards the door again.

"Daisuke, I woke up with blood on my penis and in my pubic hair. What did I do to you!?"

Daisuke snapped, " **OUT!** **GET OUT!!!** ", he shouted as he picked up a random object to throw at Taichi which turned out to be a plastic cup Taichi had been drinking out of. He hurled it at him but ended up getting most of the contents on himself from the way he picked up and threw it. It bounced off Taichi's chest and fell to the floor, empty. Daisuke's fists were clenched and he was breathing rapidly.

Taichi stood there, silently. He opened his mouth to say something but then closed it and turned away. He picked up his shoes and walked out the door, carrying them in hand, and closed it softly. Daisuke then walked over, deadbolting it. He then slowly collapsed to the floor, sliding down with his back against the door.

He sat with his fingers tangled in his hair, pulling on it for a while before standing again. "That asshole", he said out loud. He cleaned up the spilled soda from the thrown cup and threw the paper towels in the trash. He then went and grabbed the pizza and threw the entire box in the trash, along with the cup and plate.

He forcefully pulled his clothes off and threw them away too. He didn't want anything which reminded him of Taichi any more. He went to his bedroom, nude, and pulled his sheets off and threw them in the washer before getting in the shower. 

He was fuming at Taichi. Why couldn't he have pretended this hadn't happened? He slowly turned the water up hotter and hotter. It got to an almost scalding temperature when it maxed out, but Daisuke wanted it to get hotter. He scrubbed himself vigorously and dried himself equally as forcefully after staying in long enough that the hot water had started to turn cold. He stepped out and put his sheets in the dryer and then dressed himself. He then collapsed to the floor again, sobbing.

'Why couldn't that asshole have let things be?' He thought to himself.

He sat there until the dryer beeped. When he tried to stand his muscles were stiff from not having been moved for so long. He made his bed and realized he didn't want to sleep in it. He grabbed the same blanket he'd used when he slept on the couch and went into the living room and tried to rock himself to sleep on the couch. 

He drifted in and out of sleep, every little noise seemed to jolt him awake, but he did manage to get at least _some_ sleep. He woke the next day and didn't feel like eating. He didn't want to stay in his apartment, but he didn't want to leave either. He forced himself to at least have a small glass of orange juice and felt a little better afterwards.

He went back to the couch and curled up again, still tired. The phone rang and it jolted him up. He eyed it suspiciously, knowing that he rarely received phone calls on the weekend. Not wanting whomever it was to keep calling back and disturb his sleep, he picked it up and answered.

"Hello?"

"Hi Daisuke", it was Yamato.

"What do you want?"

"Uh, well. Taichi told me what happened last night and wants to apologize but he doesn't know what to do. He's afraid to call you or come over because he doesn't want to upset you."

"Upset me?! _Now_ he's doesn't want to upset me?" He heard a voice in the background that was clearly Taichi's, but not clearly enough to make out what he said.

"I understand you're angry, quite frankly I would've gone down and dumped a bucket of water on him instead of bringing him home that night, but he's been pestering me all morning to call you; I think he's really serious when he says he's sorry."

"Tell him to drop dead." With that, he hung up the phone and unplugged the cord from the wall. "Asshole", he muttered. Settling back into a comfortable position, he closed his eyes and nodded off again.

Again, almost every little noise jolted him awake. It was a fitful sleep, devoid of any real rest. He felt somewhat refreshed physically, but mentally he felt like he hadn't really slept at all when he woke a few hours later. He tried to eat something again and was able to eat a meal, but it was almost devoid of any pleasure; the food tasted so bland it was like eating paper.

He heard footsteps in the hall. Closer and closer they came. There was a knock on his door and he jumped, adrenaline pumping at full throttle.

"Daisuke, it's Yamato. Are you home? I've been trying to call you all day."

Daisuke was frozen still.

"Daisuke, come on. Taichi's not here, and I'm not taking his side. He hasn't shut up all day and I just want to get this over with so I can tell him you're really serious about it."

Daisuke walked over to the door and opened it, "Did he tell you everything that happened?"

"Uh, what do you mean?"

"Forget it, he obviously didn't."

There was a tense silence, as Yamato obviously sensed there was something bigger going on. Daisuke finally broke it, "Look, he fucked up. He fucked up **big time**! I don't want to see him again, _ever_! I meant it when I said he could drop dead."

With that, Daisuke slammed the door in his face despite Yamato's concerned protests. He waited there until he heard him walk off, and went over to the couch again and just sat.

He began to think about how much he used to adore Taichi. How much of a crush he used to have on him. How much he _wanted_ to be touched by him in that way. It was just so wrong the way it happened though.

'Why am I so upset?' He thought to himself. 'Why is this so bad? Why does it feel like such a horrible thing when if he'd just been sober and said a few kind words I'd have dragged him into bed with me? Why is it so different because of that?'

He lay down and tried to take a short nap, not even wanting to be conscious anymore. He tossed and turned, and may have drifted into a light sleep several times but ultimately sat up again after sleep had continued to elude him. His mind returned to his original question of why he was so upset over this.

He couldn't find an answer and he began crying at the thought of how Taichi probably really did feel horrible about what he'd done. Maybe he should go over and talk to him. Maybe this would finally get him to stop drinking.

He decided to walk over to Taichi's apartment and left his own, walking slowly down the street. The whoosh of passing cars and even the blaring of a siren seemed so distant. It felt more like he was watching a movie of himself walk down the street than actually being present there.

He finally arrived at Taichi's building and noticed a bit of a commotion was happening when an ambulance and several other emergency vehicles drove off. There were several more ambulances and police cars still parked on the street. Feeling the pit of his stomach sink, he rushed up the stairs to Taichi's apartment to find Hikari standing outside of it with a several people wearing various uniforms inside of it.

"What happened?!" He shouts.

Turning around to reveal a tear-covered face, she struggles with her words, "Daisuke, Taichi... he... he's dead... he just killed himself... he left this note saying he's sorry to you", she then offers a piece of paper to him.

'No, _no_ , **NO**!' Daisuke thinks to himself. He turns and begins running. It doesn't matter where he goes, he just knows he has to get away. Down the stairs, onto the street, he weaves in and out of people's paths, dodging strollers and joggers and shoppers; he keeps running and running until he's out of breath and has no choice but to stop.

Chest heaving, he braces himself against a pole. He still wants to get away. Wherever he is now, it's not far enough away. He wants to run more and more, but no matter how far he thinks he can go, it doesn't seem far enough.

He looks up and sees a large truck heading down the road towards him. Without hesitating, he leaps over the barrier separating the road from the sidewalk and throws himself into its path. He hears an airhorn blow and tires screech, and covers his face with his arms. He hears a loud crash, and then... nothing. Confused, he turns around and sees the truck has swerved into a telephone pole, which is now lying in the middle of the road. Several other cars have been hit too.

He sees a crowd begin to form in a circle behind one of the cars. Swallowing, he walks over and hears the murmurs of the crowd.

"...came outta nowhere...", "So young...", "Nothing EMS can do...", "...died on impact..."

He can see the legs of a young man or older boy lying on the asphalt and gets closer, thinking that he's already caused two deaths in one day, he should at least know who the other person is.

He squeezes through the crowd and sees familiar clothes and a familiar face. He stands in disbelief over someone that looks _exactly_ like him. Not only are they wearing the same clothes, his face is identical to his own. The only difference is that the person lying on the ground is covered in blood and clearly isn't breathing.

"Who- does anyone know his name?" Daisuke asks the crowd.

No response.

"Hey! Does anyone know what his name is?"

Still no response.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!" He shouts at a person nearby, grabbing their shoulders and shaking them when they don't respond, yet they still don't even turn their head to him.

"What the hell! Why are you all ignoring me?!" He shouts as he tries desperately to get someone's, _anyone's_ attention, yet they continue to ignore him.

Defeated, he squeezes back through the crowd and walks back over to the sidewalk.

"Why won't they respond to me?" He says, to no one in particular.

"Because you're not like them anymore", a familiar voice calls out, "They can't see you."

Head shooting up, he sees the source of it. "Taichi! How... I thought you were-"

"I am", he says. "And you are too. I saw it happen. I tried to stop you. I didn't want this. I thought if I went, you'd be OK. I didn't want this to happen..."

Things were beginning to sink in, "You mean... I'm dead..." Daisuke says as the realization slowly comes to him.

"...yeah"

"It's strange... I didn't want you to die either, Taichi. I was just- I was just so _angry_ that were such a **jerk** all the time! I just wanted you to be like you were. Like you were before you went off to college and met your new friends. I-" Daisuke hesitated for a moment. "I loved you. I still do. I just..." Daisuke couldn't finish his sentence.

"I- I guess I always knew. It started out as a crush, but you really fell in love with me didn't you?" Taichi paused to look at his shoes. "I guess I never said anything because I was waiting for you to say something first. I thought- I thought if I said it first I'd be a creep for hitting on a friend... and a kouhai. Heh, funny how that turned out. I didn't want to be a creep and look at what I did."

An uncomfortable silence ensued. It was broken by Daisuke.

"I'm sorry."

Taichi laughed. " _You're_ apologizing to _me_? After what I did?"

"If I hadn't gotten so mad-"

Taichi cut him off, "You had every right to be mad. After I-"

"Taichi", Daisuke interrupted, "I don't care anymore. I just don't want to be alone here."

Taichi took a cautious step forward. Daisuke looked up into his eyes. Reaching out an unsteady hand, Taichi gently stroked Daisuke's cheek, upon which Daisuke leapt forward, wrapping his arms around Taichi and burying his head in his chest.

"I'm so scared", he sobbed, "No one can see us. No one knows we're here. Aren't there supposed to be other people here? What if there're demons, what if they ate everyone, what if-"

"Shh", Taichi soothed him, "It's OK. I can't believe the afterlife could be that bad."

"But we killed ourselves! Doesn't that mean bad things happen to us?"

"Maybe we just need to figure something out before we go on", Taichi suggested.

"You think so?" Daisuke said, looking up into Taichi's eyes.

"Probably", he gave a weak, yet soothing smile. "If we were going to have bad things happen to us, why wouldn't they be happening already?"

"Maybe you're right..." Daisuke said before relaxing into Taichi's arms. "I feel like nothing else matters anymore. Like- strangely at peace with everything that happened. I'm not mad at you anymore." He sighed into Taichi's chest, "But I still miss everyone. I wonder if the way I feel is real or if I'm just in denial about everything."

Taichi continued to stroke Daisuke's hair, "Well, it might take a long time, but we'll get to see them again when it's their time, right?"

"I guess so."

Daisuke remained in Taichi's embrace for a moment longer before slowly pulling away.

"Let's go for walk", Taichi suggests.

They walked along the sidewalk, in no hurry to go anywhere. They strolled down different streets, taking in various sights. Neither of them seemed to care about what had happened to them.

They continued walking for what seemed like hours when Taichi suggested they head towards the Rainbow Bridge to watch the sun set.

"That's funny, I was thinking the same thing too", Daisuke said.

They headed towards the Rainbow Bridge and Daisuke was the first to point out an odd addition to it.

"Hey, where does _that_ go? That wasn't there yesterday", he said, referring to another bridge that was connected to the middle of it and stretched out all the way over the ocean to the horizon and beyond.

"I don't know", Taichi responded. He got a serious look on his face, "But I feel like I need to walk on it. Wherever it takes me, I don't know, I feel like I _have_ to."

"So do I", Daisuke responded. "Strange, I was going to say that we'd need to bring food and water but I don't feel hungry or thirsty, do you?"

"No", Taichi shook his head. "I don't feel tired either, or scared."

"You were scared?" Daisuke asked.

Taichi looked away for a moment, "A little bit before, but it's gone now."

"Me too", Daisuke responded.

Arriving at the point that connected the new bridge that now clearly stretched out beyond the horizon, Daisuke squinted and saw the length of the bridge as it noticeably curved around the surface of the Earth as it stretched so far across the expanse of the ocean. It clearly could not have been man-made.

"We won't be able to come back once we go, will we?" Daisuke said, already knowing the answer in his heart. He seemed to just _know_ instinctively what to do now.

"No", Taichi affirmed, "Are you ready?"

"Yeah", he replied.

Joining hands, they began walking across the bridge. Hours passed, night fell, and they still continued to walk on and on. Leaving behind any noise made by humans long ago, only the tranquility of the ocean gave any sound. Never tiring, and having little need for words, they continued walking on into the expanse of infinity while being bathed in the light of the moon.

**Author's Note:**

> So, what do you think? What happened to Taichi and Daisuke? Is this a "happily-ever-after" ending, or was their journey their penance? Or was it something else? I had my own idea in mind when I wrote this, but I'd be curious to hear what your theory is. Please leave a comment and let me know! ^_^


End file.
